RENT

[perididdle]

A HOMELESS MAN

Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
Somewhere else!
Not here

(The HOMELESS MAN exits. ANGEL gets a good beat going on the tub,
but is interrupted by a moan. Starts to drum again and sees
COLLINS limp to downstage-left proscenium.)

ANGEL

You okay honey?

COLLINS

I'm afraid so

ANGEL

They get any money?

COLLINS

No
Had none to get --
But they purloined my coat --
Well you missed a sleeve! -- Thanks

ANGEL

Hell, it's Christmas Eve
I'm Angel

COLLINS

Angel..? Indeed
An angel of the first degree
Friends call me Collins -- Tom Collins
Nice tree ...

ANGEL

Let's get a band-aid for your knee
I'll change, there's a "Life Support" meeting at nine-thirty
Yes -- this body provides a comfortable home
For the Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome

COLLINS

As does mine

ANGEL

We'll get along fine
Get you a coat, have a bite
Make a night -- I'm flush

COLLINS

My friends are waiting --

ANGEL

You're cute when you blush
The more the merri -- ho ho ho
And I do not take no

Okay...anyone wanna guess Angel's gender?


One song
Glory
One song
Before I go
Glory
One song to leave behind
Find one song
One last refrain
Glory
From the pretty boy front man
Who wasted opportunity
One song
He had the world at his feet
Glory
In the eyes of a young girl
A young girl
Find glory
Beyond the cheap colored lights
One song
Before the sun sets
Glory -- on another empty life
Time flies -- time dies
Glory -- One blaze of glory
One blaze of glory -- glory
Find
Glory
In a song that rings true
Truth like a blazing fire
An eternal flame
Find
One song
A song about love
Glory
From the soul of a young man
A young man
Find
The one song
Before the virus takes hold
Glory
Like a sunset
One song
To redeem this empty life
Time flies
And then - no need to endure anymore
Time dies
(ROGER is interrupted by a sharp knock on the door.)
The door

That song is just GREAT.


ROGER

What'd you forget?

(MIMI enters, holding a candle)

MIMI

Got a light?

ROGER

I know you? -- You're --
You're shivering

MIMI

It's nothing
They turned off my heat
And I'm just a little
Weak on my feet
Would you light my candle?
What are you staring at?

ROGER

Nothing
Your hair in the moonlight
You look familiar
(He lights her candle. MIMI starts to leave, but stumbles.)
Can you make it?

MIMI

Just haven't eaten much today
At least the room stopped spinning.
Anyway. What?

ROGER

Nothing
Your smile reminded me of --

MIMI

I always remind people of -- who is she?

ROGER

She died. Her name was April

(MIMI discreetly blows out the candle.)

MIMI

It's out again
Sorry about your friend
Would you light my candle?

(ROGER lights the candle. They linger, awkwardly.)

ROGER

Well --

MIMI

Yeah. Ow!

ROGER

Oh, the wax -- it's --

MIMI

Dripping! I like it -- between my --

ROGER

Fingers. I figured...
Oh, well. Goodnight.

(MIMI exits. ROGER heads back toward his guitar on the table.
There is another knock, which he answers.)

It blew out again?

MIMI

No -- I think that I dropped my stash

ROGER

I know I've seen you out and about
When I used to go out
Your candle's out

MIMI

I'm illin' --
I had it when I walked in the door
It was pure --
Is it on the floor?

ROGER

The floor?

(MIMI gets down on all fours and starts searching
the floor for her stash. She lookss back at ROGER,
who is staring at her again.)

MIMI

They say I have the best ass below 14th street
Is it true?

ROGER

What?

MIMI

You're staring again.

ROGER

Oh no.
I mean you do -- have a nice --
I mean -- You look familiar

MIMI

Like your dead girlfriend?

ROGER

Only when you smile.
But I'm sure I've seen you somewhere else --

MIMI

Do you go to the Cat Scratch Club?
That's where I work - I dance - help me look

ROGER

Yes!
They used to tie you up --

MIMI

It's a living

(MIMI douses the flame again.)

ROGER

I didn't recognize you
Without the handcuffs

MIMI

We could light the candle
Oh won't you light the candle?

(ROGER lights it again.)

ROGER

Why don't you forget that stuff
You look like you're sixteen

MIMI

I'm nineteen -- but I'm old for my age
I'm just born to be bad

ROGER

I once was born to be bad
I used to shiver like that

MIMI

I have no heat -- I told you

ROGER

I used to sweat

MIMI

I got a cold

ROGER

Uh huh
I used to be a junkie

MIMI

But now and then I like to --

ROGER

Uh huh

MIMI

Feel good

ROGER

Here it -- um --

(ROGER stoops and picks up a small object: MIMI's stash.)

MIMI

What's that?

ROGER

It's a candy bar wrapper

(ROGER puts it behind his back and into his pocket.)

MIMI

We could light the candle

(ROGER discreetly blows out the candle.)

MIMI

What'd you do with my candle?

ROGER

That was my last match

MIMI

Our eyes'll adjust, thank God for the moon

ROGER

Maybe it's not the moon at all
I hear Spike Lee's shooting down the street

MIMI

Bah humbug ... Bah humbug

(MIMI places her hand under his, pretending to do it by accident.)

ROGER

Cold hands

MIMI

Yours too.
Big. Like my father's
You wanna dance?

ROGER

With you?

MIMI

No -- with my father

ROGER

I'm Roger

MIMI

They call me
They call me Mimi

(They come extremely close to a kiss.
MIMI reaches into his pocket, nabs the stash,
waves it in front of his face, and makes a sexy exit.)

Mimi. Is. The. BEST.

I'm very Mimi/Roger and Angel/Collins. Joanne/Maureen is just downright FUN, but I wanna write some Mark/Maureen and play around with that...


COLLINS

Gentlemen, our benefactor on this Christmas Eve
Whose charity is only matched by talent, I believe
A new member of the Alphabet City avant-garde
Angel Dumott Schunard!

(ANGEL sashays in. Is gorgeously done up in Santaness, with a fan of twenty-dollar bills in each hand.)

ANGEL

Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me

COLLINS

And you should hear her beat!

MARK

You earned this on the street?

ANGEL

It was my lucky day today on Avenue A
When a lady in a limousine drove my way
She said, "Dahling -- be a dear -- haven't slept in a year
I need your help to make my neighbor's yappy dog disappear"
"This Akita-Evita just won't shut up
I believe if you play non-stop that pup
Will breathe its very last high-strung breath
I'm certain that cur will bark itself to death"
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
We agreed on a fee -- A thousand dollar guarantee
Tax-free -- and a bonus if I trim her tree
Now who could foretell that it would go so well
But sure as I am here that dog is now in doggy hell
After an hour -- Evita -- in all her glory
On the window ledge of that 23rd story
Like Thelma and Louise did when they got the blues
Swan dove into the courtyard of the Gracie Mews
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me

(ANGEL does a fabulous drum and dance solo.)

Then back to the street where I met my sweet
Where he was moaning and groaning on the cold concrete
The nurse took him home for some mercurochrome
And I dressed his wounds and got him back on his feet
Sing it!
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me
Today for you -- tomorrow for me

FABULOUS...doesn't even BEGIN to explain it. Oh it's brillaint. People were doing cat calls and whistling and such. And that was just funny....EVERYONE was. Angel hops up onto a table and I'm sure there wasn't a person in the house that didn't call or clap or something.

Okay. Enough Renthead Maddy. I'm quite obsessed though.

-Maddy